Return to work Friday. Ugh.

NOT happy about going back on Friday. Nothing positive to say about it.

So, the positive right now is that I love my boys and hubby. I also had testing done today for our insurance wellness thing that lowers the cost of our insurance by $130/month, and my good cholesterol and bad cholesteral were great, total of 180. BP was 110/60, and blood sugar was normal. I need to lose this last 35 pounds, but thank goodness that my testing came back so well! I am 2% from being in the moderate BMI range based on their machine, instead of overweight...so I plan on figuring out how the heck to get good exercise in after I return to stupid work. I have been walking so much with Andrew, and at this point, I guess what I will have to do is the BL programs at night after he goes to sleep. Blah! But it must be done, to keep my #'s good as I age, and to get my weight down lower.

Done with Christmas shopping. Got Ev the Red Rider big wheel today. That brings his haul to the little alien from Project 51, a boat from "Santa," 10 hot wheels for his stocking, a pirate Mr. Potato Head, Toy Story camping set (sleeping bag, flashlight, compass, duffel bag), and a Kid Tough Fisher Price digital camera. Picked up a little 3 month+ shaker toy for Andrew so he can have a little wrapped gift from "Santa" as well for Evan to open in his honor. ;)

I MUST get my oil changed tomorrow, as well as smog check, and get to the DMV to get my tags. Thursday I would like to just relax all day. I have a breakfast with girlfriends at 8:30, after that I'd like to come home and relax and watch some movies with Daryl, since he's home from Thurs-New year! I also have to figure out what we are going to pay my friend who is watching Andrew for 42 hours/month...I just have no clue! Hmmmm....

Should start dinner for the boys while Andrew is sleeping in his swing. Bit concerned as Andrew has had a slight cough today, hoping it goes away overnight, if not then tomorrow will start with a visit to urgent care. He is breathing fine, and he had his 4 month appt with his doc yesterday and it went well, so...let's hope it is nothing!

Trying to not wallow in my sadness about returning to work, or about our living situation and how that stress will add to my general miserableness once I return. Argh.

Overall I know I am lucky, but at the same time...some things are pretty painful. :( Meh.

pretty dress...next haircut

Picked up a very cute little black dress with fun, sparkly sequins trimming the hem. It's for my work Christmas party! :) Tomorrow I am going to go get my hair cut. Hoping for a cute bob. It's been 9 months since I last got my hair cut...sheesh! I'm nervous because they never do what I really want no matter where I go it seems. But anything is better than the mess I keep gathering in a ponytail, and clipping my icky, grown out bangs.

Back to work in 17 days.

SO much to get done before 12/18. I feel like that is doomsday, which I realize is ridiculous. SO many people looking for jobs right now, so many without health insurance, and I have both of those. But, I just want so badly to stay home with Andrew. Or well, walk 2-3 hours/day with Andrew, grab a coffee, do the laundry, cook dinner for my boys every night, etc.


My to-do list is insane! I have breakfast with the gals Thursday, Weight watchers Saturday, obnoxious DMV appointment Monday, need to take family Christmas pic for our cards, order those cards, order picture gifts for family for Christmas, get haircut before 12/12, work Christmas party on 12/12, Andrews 4-month well baby appt 12/14, Insurance wellness appointment 12/15 (blood test/weight/etc to lower cost of insurance by setting "health goals"), finalize info on who is taking care of Andrew when I go back to work, get new pics put on digital frame for my desk at work, get gift for gf's 30th bday, Daryl's work Christmas thing (maybe...it is the day I go back to work, so I think I'm skipping it?)

All of this makes me want to run for the nearest pizza buffet. Fighting well so far, have snacked more the last couple of days but still a little down on the scale, and still on control. Have to keep this in check...ugh! Stressed may spell desserts backwards, but that doesn't mean I have to eat them!